"Is It Hard"

Most people that know me also know that for the last 5 months, my husband has been working out of the area during the week and home on weekends. I will be the first to admit not everyone thinks before they speak but recently when talking to a friend, she asked how things were going. She then proceeded to ask me "is it hard?" What I really wanted to do was ask her if pigs give birth to elephants in comparison to what my daily life is like but I merely said "we make the best of it." Then I got to thinking "is it hard" well you tell me? My days start between 4:30 and 5:00 a.m. (depending on when beasty wakes up hungry), I basically cruise from getting dressed, to brewing coffee, making bottles, packing a lunch, making a chore list for the older kids, to waking beasty back up, and starting the 30 minute procrastination rodeo that it takes to get Kanyon out of bed every morning. We leave our house by 7:15 to drop Kaleb off at football practice and the beasts off at daycare with enough time that I can make it to work without being late. On an average day I have 8-10 files of equipment that are piled on my desk, my phone rings multiple times, and I'm continuously getting interrupted by somebody that needs/wants something (have I mentioned I'm under paid LOL). My lunch breaks are generally spent either a. running kids b. running kids or c. picking up kids to run them somewhere. My work afternoons are spent essentially just like the mornings. I leave the office at 4:00 and head straight to pick up kids from daycare then home to run Kaleb to football practice again. Upon arriving home I notice that a tornado has magically hit our home again and it's a scattered mess but like I said, it's magical because the house was clean when I left it and nobody confesses to anything. Kan is crying because I didn't let him open the door, Kimbree is crying because she's hungry and now I've dropped my purse, the mail, and spilled a bottle trying to get beasty fed. I take a 30 minute break to feed baby, build garages for Kan's cars, pick up the "magical" mess before it's time to start dinner and then what do you know the phone rings and somebody needs a ride AGAIN. I'm lucky to get dinner on the table by 7:00 and without flaw someone is ALWAYS complaining (Kennedy) because they (she) doesn't like green beans or casserole or tacos with soft shells - the list goes on. Beasty is screaming because she wants to eat what everyone else is eating so I cave to calm her down, right about the time Kan spills his drink all over the table. Whew finally another mess is cleaned up but everyone is asking to leave the table, I haven't yet eaten but that's ok everyone is taken care of and the house is quiet at least for a minute. Cleaning up dinner, turns into baths, picking up another mess, Kan crying because he didn't want those pajamas, Kimbree pulling my hair, Kennedy making Kan cry because well that's what Kennedy does. I go to sit down and realize I need to start a load of laundry the baby barfed all over her clothes at daycare and well let's face it I will make a load of wash versus having stained clothes. I go to sit down again "hey mom I need a $120 for football." I go to sit down again and the baby pooped, time for diaper change. I go to sit down again and Kan starts crying because well he's tired and he needs his blanket. I feed beasty and kiss her little cheeks then put her to bed (she's a gem and goes down so easy). Kan wants to read his Monsters book again for the 14th time this week so we read a story and snuggle for ten minutes before the clothes need to go in the dryer. Kaleb and Kennedy and fighting over what's on tv AGAIN. Kan's finally crashed its 10:30 p.m and the laundry needs folded. Cars, blocks, blankets, and many other toys are scattered widely throughout the kitchen and living room. I spend time picking the house back up and realize another day went by and I didn't get a workout in. The kitty litter needs changed and kittens need food its 11:00. I forgot to make a night bottle CRAP! I sit for 30 minutes and fall asleep on the couch, then get up turn everything off and lock the doors, its 12:30 a.m. and I'm just crawling into bed and shutting my eyes. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 1:30 and beasty is waking up hungry, I crawl out of bed to warm a bottle and get back in bed its now 2:00 a.m. Before I know it the alarm is going off and my days starting all over again. Is it hard, NAH it's just another day in park!!!

13-iny BOPPER

13 REALLY? Where in the heck did that number come from and why did it come so fast? 13 WHEW we are both still alive and at this point I'm honestly just surprised we've made it this far. I'm sure that I'm not the only parent/person that has heard OVER & OVER - boys are easier than girls! Whoever was the first to make that statement deserves a good sturdy handshake (and a stiff drink) because they nailed that one on the head. Girls are hard; teenage girls are HARDER. Ok I can say I hate social media and what it's done to our youth but I'm just as corrupt with Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat. I can totally see why my 13 year old daughter is continuously taking selfies to post, yep I'm just as guilty - don't judge just download the damn app, it's the cool thing to do. Ok so on to better topics of conversation HOLY FREAKING COW, Kennedy is 13! She is a handful I will say that but she also has some very distinct qualities that make her a gem (she may need polished but nonetheless she's still a diamond in the rough). Kennedy is hard headed and fiesty, she could quite literally give you a run for your money then come back and rob you. She can fight with her 3 year old brother just as aggressively as her 14 year old brother, because she doesn't think before she speaks. She takes 214 selfies a day for snapchat and changes friends well like her underwear. One day best friends, the next day they hate each other, two days later she's my BFF - yep that's Kennedy in a nutshell. She's a disaster, you can tell every room in our house that Kennedy enters because of the trail she leaves behind. She's a messy slob and she doesn't have an organized bone in her body. She's sassy, she's genuine, she can be a royal pain in the a** but she's also my pain and I love her beyond measure. I love that she doesn't let people push her around. I love that she speaks up for herself and others that she cares about. I love that when she can see I'm worn out she will lend a helping hand. I love that she cares deeply for others. I love that she can melt into my arms and cry on my shoulder when life is wearing on her. I love that she can forgive and forget. Her great qualities far exceed her flaws, sometimes I have to remind myself of that. Sometimes when I need a time out, I can breathe and think she's just 13, this too shall pass and other times I want to wash her mouth out with soap. Kennedy despite what you may think because we often clash, I love you. I love you deeply, wholely, and completely and my life would never be the same without you. Thank you for challenging me - yes even the bad challenges. We've grown up alot together and learned alot of lessons (the hard way). I want you to know at the start and end of each day I'm eternally grateful for you and YOU just the way you are. Now GO clean up your mess, LOL. Happy Birthday Beautiful and always be "Your Own Kind Of Beautiful."

Fire Cracker Fire Cracker BOOM BOOM BOOM

We made our annual jaunt down to Kansas (actually for the 2nd time this year) to hang out with the Kansas fam over the 4th of July. Over the last few years we've seemed to make being in Kansas a tradition celebrating the 4th. We always enjoy the time we get with family; eating yummy food, reminiscing, playing yahtzee with granny, going to the zoo and pool, watching fireworks, and above all making memories. The hardest part of the whole trip is saying goodbye. They say goodbyes are not forever only temporary and I'd like to believe that, until we meet again - be safe, laugh, love, and live for the moment. The value of a moment is something that can last an entire lifetime. I value minutes, moments, hours, and days because we never know what life may throw into our path.

"Heaven Seems a Little Nearer When Someone You Love is There"

I wish there were visiting hours in heaven! I miss you grandpa, our trip home wasn't the same without you. I missed seeing you in your chair, I kept waiting for you to stagger in and sit down; wearing your white tank with your levis half way done up and belt buckle hanging array. I missed seeing you on the porch swing watching the kids play in the yard. I missed pouring your coffee and the sound of your shaver after your shower. I missed seeing you reach down to let a small hand grasp yours so you could lead the way. I missed watching you pull your boots on and go out to the shop to use the bathroom (hey when you gotta go you gotta go). I missed your tight hugs that end with a couple pats on the back. I missed seeing you lie next to grandma when we woke up in the morning and hearing her tell you to put the oxygen back on. I missed watching your feet tap to the beat of an old time tune. I missed you talking with your hands, hands that bore the marks of age and hard work. I missed you at the dining room table, so quiet yet observant while eating a good meal. I know you're happy and you're waiting so patiently for us to join you so our circle will be complete. As sure as the sun sets and the moon rises, I carry you in my heart and soul waiting for the day you will wrap your arms around me in one of your extra tight embraces. Keep strumming your tune and shining your light because we know you're there and it helps us smile through the tears. I loved you then, I love you still, I always have, I always will.

7, 8, 9.....

Yes I know, I'm 3 months behind and as much as I would love to say I will get better and be more diligent about staying "on top" of things I probably won't. This little ham is sooooo much fun, her personality has really evolved in the last few months. She pulls the cutest faces and you never know which face she will beam at you. She scoots on her bum, rolls to where she needs to be, and goes backwards but refuses to crawl, stubborn child this little diva is. She's 20 lbs. ALREADY (I know don't judge - we grow em big) we can't seem to keep her in clothes. She flies around the kitchen in her walker, running over innocent toes and we don't even want to go with the speed she catches down our driveway. She cries when you walk out of a room then immediately flashes her two tooth smile when she sees you again. She adores her big brothers Kaleb and Kanyon, she will squish up her nose and grin from ear to ear when she sees them. She's obviously a superb eater but wants to feed herself, talk about an icky mess. My heart aches when I'm away from her, I just want to pick her up and squeeze her (she hates this) every chance I get. In the last month, she started saying dada, kittyyyyyyyy, hi, and we caught her on video saying uh oh although she hasn't said it since. She loves to be outside in the sunshine, going for walks or bouncing in her exer-saucer. If I could freeze frame these moments with her, I would do so in a heart beat. She's the beat to my heart, the cheese to my sandwich, the pop to my corn. I want to keep her this little forever, keep her safe, away from the hardships in this world and from ever being hurt. I can't thank you enough Kimbree for lighting up my world, every day.